we are the new shit.

When kids are still at the below 13 year old range and '* -_::ttypexx liddattx, iit ishh f0rgivvable::_- *'. But when puberty kicks in and they still insist that it is their personal unique style when the world has probably millions other twits who tthinnk deyy rre uniqque bbcos deyy typExx liddatx, I really should recommend them a good institute to recuperate their mental health.

So when these twits get to the age when sex is illegal but is the only way to get a guy/ impress a girl with your well hung thang, twits will thus have intercourse, preferably with another twit since banging a twit might cause you to lose just a few thousands of brain cells. It doesn't really matter for them, since they have no brains to develops brain cells in the first place.

Firstly, I'd rate this article R21, as certain sexual issues will be covered. However, we all know nobody seriously gives a fuck and you'd all read on anyway. So there.

**

Firstly, let us start this article with a picture of twits having sex. I couldn't really find any pictures over the net, so I decided to come up with the next best thing.

Unf unf baby.

I know what you're thinking, that this picture has completely nothing to do with twits. Well, think about this. Can a kawaii jap dude penetrate a kawaii jap gerger with such a forceful impact like the elephant does to his female mate? Can a ah-lian-who-keeps-on-denying-she's-not-lian moan as erotically as the female elephant?

Well, I bet the male elephant could penetrate the kawaii jap dude if he wants to.

**

Interesting Facts on Twits and intercourse

1) No matter how many condoms you put on or whatsoever pills you are on, once a twit penetrates another, both of them are die die sure to get a lethal STD and will die in let's say... 7 days?

2) The female party usually starts her period straight after the male's penis penetrates her, leaving them with a pool of dirty blood and a very buay song ger ger.

3) The first time twits have intercourse, it doesn't bleed at all even though the girl's hymen is broken, but it will bleed profusely the other times they have sex again until the girl hits 55 years old.

4) As at a tender age of 16-18 so, virginity is still a very taboo issue to touch on. So whenever they have sex, they just have to go for Sunday mass at City Harvest and all their sins will be cleansed and they are a virgin once more. Then they start screwing around again.

5) The safest way for twits to have sex without getting any illnesses or new found babies is to install Norton Anti Virus 2005 into the P and the V drive.

6) For a more pleasurable orgasm, penetration is not a must. Pink, vintage micky lingerie and cheap perfume from a hello kitty bottle can bring any dead's man penis to life.

7) If you are considering porn videos for starters to turn you and your partner on, use ONLY japanese porn videos and the female lead should act like she traded her brain for fake gucci.

8) Shouting loudly "KAY ANN ANN BEE SEE SEE BEE!" or some stupid gang poem should boost some sperm count.

**

As much as pinksters love pink in their fashion, talk or makeup, they too love pink in their sex. Here are a list of products MOT is offering that will make you and your partner wild animals even if the guy claims to have a 12 inch boner when its only 5'11 its your first time.

Thai Imported Strawberry Flavoured Pink Condom
S$3/pack

Pink condoms, preferably strawberry flavoured. It doesn't matter if its exported from Thailand or even Pipi Island since you know twits are so stupid they'll probably end up getting assortments of STDs anyway.

Sexy 2 piece pink lingerie / flowers also used as mini vibrators
S$359

What else can be more orgasmic then a pink lingerie? DUH, pink flowers to go along with it. This tacky dress will make any female/male twit look fuckadelish.

Pretty and Pink anal plug
S$19.30

Does it matter what this is? As long as its pretty and pink, pinkstersjapsterskawaiisterscutestersfriendsters will all flock to buy this, only because its pretty and pink. :D

Fur pink handcuffs with keys that don't match
S$29

Pink handcuffs, oh the kinkiness. Don't ask me why it looks like meat patties, right now I'm very much hoping its just fur.

Safe Sex Kit that's very idiotproof
S$2.40

As said above, practising safe sex is pretty much useless for twits, but this safe sex kit is in PINK!! Pinko whamo. And for the record, its even idiot proof. They even have a condom holder, which the twits probably use as an anal plug. The personal lubricant is so pink, the twits might not be able to resist the pinkoness of it and instead of using it to ease penetration, they start smearing it all over themselves so they can shine with pinky.

That is a incomplete list of products MOT offers. For more explict products, you can email us at twitsPI@yahoo.com personally and we will send you the complete list. We at MOT ensure you a rockin' first time / highly orgasmic and mind shattering experience. For further enquiries, please call our T.T. Durai inspired hotline that only opens at alternate days of the third week of every month, from 12 noon to 1.30pm, not including lunch hour time - 1900-911-twitsdie !!!

Remember folks, do NOT feed the twits.

// posted by Anonymous @ 12:38 PM